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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

January 31, 2012


My dearest sweet Tommy,


Well today is my first writing class...I hope it all goes well...I am going out with friends afterwords so it will be a good day.....


The kids are glad I am doing things....I have fun when I am out with my friends...they make me laugh and they make me realize it will all be okay.....


I will always miss you and that will never change....I will always love you forever.....I will always be your girl.....No matter what.....You will live in me forever.......


I know one day we will be together again.....that I know for sure....I know that you will wait for me and we will build a great home in the spirit world....


Walk with me babes in everything I do...I love you....


Your wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik



Monday, January 30, 2012

January 30, 2012

Photos from Mother Alice

To my dearest sweet Tommy,


I love you my babes....I did not sleep well last night....Woke up around 3 AM with some chest pains/discomfort....It went on for hours....I thought it best to call the cardiologist this morning so they instructed me to go to urgent care and have them do some blood work to check enzyme levels.....
Love Mother Alice for sharing photos with us


Please walk with me my sweet babes....Let all of this stop.....Let me get back to normal babes....It is so scary....I need to be here for our precious daughter, Shae.....I will keep praying.....
Mother Alice can take awesome photos


I have a positive attitude about it.....I pray that everything will be okay and I know Tommy with you walking beside me it will help me through all of this.....Please help me babes when I get scared from this.....
Breathtaking Mother Alice


Well I am going to get off here for now...Have to get ready to go and get ready for the day....I know you stand, walk, and sit beside me in everything I do...I love you my sweet husband and miss you more than anything.....
Breathtaking 


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik

Sunday, January 29, 2012

January 29, 2012


My dearest sweet Tommy,


Your mom came up and we ate dinner together.....It was fun....We talked a lot about you....It was really a good time and we cried together....


My friends took me out last night....we went to the Mazatzal Casino and it was so much fun....We all use to work together at the Sheriff's Office here...Had a great time and they made me laugh a lot......Here are some pictures of me for you my babes....Hope you like them....


We are going to go out again real soon....The kids are happy that I went and we had a good time....It was like old times..hanging out with them....


I talked about you a lot to them and they listened and cried with me....It was such a good time and I felt so much better after that...


I love you my babes....Forever.....


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik



Saturday, January 28, 2012

January 28, 2012


My dearest sweet Tommy,


I am so happy for you visited me in your dreams.....I love you so very much...You always help me to figure out things....Please guide me everyday and let me know you are near....


I will always look at you for answers....You are the love of my life forever.....I will always have you in my heart and soul....We will one day be together again for eternity.....


You bring my heart happiness just by visiting for a short while....It helps me to think clearer and makes me see that you are with me no matter what......


I wonder if your mom will come by today...I hope she does....We have such a connection....Also I am suppose to go out tonight with Beth....I know you remember her....I worked with her at the sheriff's office here in Payson .....so I am excited over visiting with her.....


Well my love I am going to get off here for now...I will talk to you soon and can't wait for the next visit in my dreams....


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik

Friday, January 27, 2012

January 27, 2012

Sacred Oak Flats

My dearest sweet Tommy,


The kids are going to the movies....They want to see "The Grey" and are so excited over it.....They are a sight.....Love them dearly.....
Oak Flats: Very Sacred to Apaches


Well this coming Tuesday I will have my first writing class....It is going to be so much fun....I hope that I have a good turn out....I love to write and I hope others do too.....
Sunflower at Oak Flats


I miss you so very much....Time is just time...It does not help as time passes...it may for some but not for me and I don't believe it helps others either.....
Oak Flats


The love I have for you is never ending.....Nobody is like you and I knew there would never be another person like you....You loved me unconditionally and never question anything....You just loved me and I miss that so much......
Oak Flats


I don't have nobody to talk to....I just talk to whoever will listen and that is so sad.....Your mom was coming but now she is sick....with a cold I think....but she didn't want to come and bring it to us....She hopes she is feeling better by Saturday so she can come up.....
Oak Flats


I feel so alone my babes....I miss you so very much....Please walk with me and be with me all the time....I love you forever....
One of Tommy's favorite places was Oak Flats....I love you babes


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik

Thursday, January 26, 2012

January 26, 2012

Sacred Run: We shared this together and I am so thankful

My dearest sweet Tommy,


I went to the cardiologist yesterday and he has ordered some tests...I have to wear a heart monitor for 24 hours but first they have to get insurance approval.....
Sacred Run: One of your favorite spots on the Rez


I guess my heart is so broken over losing you....But you are the love of my life....You made me the happiest person in the world....Never will I get over this.....The loss is to great....I wish you were here....I don't know what to do without you.....I wonder around trying to find something to fill the void....It is so hard....
Our sunset we shared


I know I have to go on but it is so hard....I wish I could find a way to stop all the pain in my heart but it will not cease.....I love our kids more than anything and I love you more than anything....
Sacred ground Cochise Stronghold


How does one cope with such a loss.....I talk and pray to the Creator and he does listen and helps me to get through some of the most difficult times....I am so thankful for that....
Sunrise


Then of course our kids help me through and speaking to you and calling your name helps me too....I love you my babes.....I will always love you no matter what......
Beauty


Well I will go for now....Your mom is suppose to come up today...


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

January 25, 2012

Tommy's garden

My dearest sweet Tommy,


Oh how I miss you....Your guidance is needed right now....I have to try and help the kids see what I say is so important....
Tommy's Garden


Why is it that sometimes being a parent is so hard.....I know they are missing you as I do but you have to be responsible and do what you know is right.....Please give me the words to say and the right path to walk to show them what I mean.....
Tommy's Garden


I go to the cardiologist today....I am scared of all of this....I know you and the Creator will walk with me.....You will help me to face whatever the problem is....I cannot express how much I miss you.....I love you from the bottom of my heart.....
Payson, AZ


Well my babes I will talk to you soon....Please know just what is in my heart and let our kids see I am only trying to make them strong.....I love them so very much.......
Hawk for Tommy


I love you babes....forever.....
My precious Tommy


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik



Tuesday, January 24, 2012

January 24, 2012

Tommy's beautiful creation/Tommy hiding from camera

To my dearest sweet Tommy,


Well another beautiful morning here in Payson.....As the sun crests on the mountains the beauty shines through.....I love it here my babes....this is where we got married so it will be called home until I see you again.....
Our son: Erik


There are times in life you wonder about things and say why did this have to happen? I guess you learn over time why? or maybe when you go to the spirit world......
Our daughter Shaelee: Much younger


Our kids are the best in the world....They take care of me and protect me....I know you would be so proud.....I love them and I am so thankful that we were given the gift of our children from the Creator......
Our kids with their regalia on


Well my babes I am going to share some picture we took in 2009....It helps my heart to see them....I love you dearly and forever.....
Your wedding band on my necklace: Forever 


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik

Monday, January 23, 2012

January 23, 2012

Flowers in my Tommy's garden he made just for me

My dearest sweet Tommy,


I long to see your face....I just had to tell you that....I miss you so very much....That will never change....You are the love of my life.....
Tommy the love of my life trying to hide from picture


Well yesterday I had a good day as far as my heart racing....I only had to take one of my heart meds but this morning I got up and heart was racing again....Rate was 120....It is so scary when it happens....But I took my heart med so the racing should stop.....
This was made for me from my husband


I came across some pictures of you when we lived in TN...I am posting some of them today here on your blog....It shows your beautiful garden...and you ..the love of my life...There are some pictures of the kids at Christmas too....
Tommy trying to hide from picture


Well I just wanted to say how very much I love and miss you.......
Tommy's garden


Your loving wife and kids,
Melinda, Shae, & Erik