October 20, 2011

As the sun starts to rise upon Mother Earth, I know you are here with us and watching the beauty the Creator sends to us...I know you are with us each and every day...every moment...every obstacle.....

Arizona Sunrise

Here is a poem that Erik wrote for you...It is from him and Shae.....

In your memory

Dad
As I stand here I hurt                                                       
Sun setting low I am lost
I feel no more comfort
Since the day you crossed

As the wind calmly blows
How I wish together we could stand
As you guide me through this world's woes
But now you no longer walk this land

As I look towards the many skies
Your face in the heavens I see
With wings and free as the eagle flies
And majestic as the beautiful tree

As darkness settles I cry adieu (goodbye)
So proud I am that you are my dad
Always know I miss you and I love you
And help me not be so sad

I love you always Dad,
Your Son & daughter,
Erik & Shaelee

As you can see it comes from the heart....But everything you taught us came from the heart...You are a man of love and respect...A man that loved the Creator and believed in him....I know that you are in heaven and you await our arrival.....Just know we love you and miss you so very much....

You know that on your birthday I always got you a single rose, it stood for our love as one...The single rose I got you this year sits by your Urn but here is another to represent our love forever....

One single rose for my love we are one 

Also, my publisher, Dancing with Bear, Marie Marler, is publishing the Christmas Story you loved so much and it is dedicated to you my love....The cover takes my breath away because you are in the clouds looking down and  I know that you are protecting us still...With all our love....

Dedicated to you for you so loved the story

Your wife and kids,

Linda, Shaelee, & Erik

October 19, 2011

Another morning without you here....My heart is just numb....I brought you ashes home yesterday and we all cried...The urn is beautiful and we know you would like it.....Our hearts are empty..our soul blind....Without you here we try and manage to go day to day...hour by hour...minute by minute...Times its hard but we want you to know we love you more than ever just wanted you to know...

We brought you home

Its hard not knowing what to do.....But the only thing we are sure of is that we love you.....We miss your laughter, your smiling face, and believe it or not we miss you in every way.....

All we ask is for you to know that we love you and it still grows...It will never cease, it will only grow stronger....If we had one wish it would be for you to return to us....Our life is so empty without you.....

Our love only grows stronger

The pain never ceases it only grows larger....I know you understand what I am saying because a love like ours will never fade or die.....I cannot express in words how I truly feel....I just know my heart is broken and will never heal....Our love was the strongest and nothing will ever change that...


Remember, always you are with us and we love.....May the Creator God wrapped his arms around you and keep you until we can see each other again....I love you.......

We love you more each day

Your wife and kids,
Linda, Shaelee, & Erik

October 18, 2011

As the sunsets and rises you are with me throughout them both...Our connection is still the same....You are with us in everything we do...I have no words of the pain I feel but know someday it will end....When I see your face again...

Our love will remain

We have been sent so many cards Tommy and it has helped Shaelee so much...There are poems in some but one stays with us...It was from our friend Rebecca Booth to Shaelee and Erik.... I would like to share it with you and to the world because it is touching to say the least...so here it is.....

Arizona Sunrise

Who would have thought you would go so soon....              
With you being gone, my life is so gloom...
I hate the fact you've gone away...
but know in my heart...
I know you'll stay...
You taught me right from wrong.....
and with this knowledge I must go on...
With hurt and pain in my heart...
I do know that we'll never be apart...
You made me laugh..
You made me cry...
with those moments...
I will make it by...
You are gone this I see...
and I know you are in heaven watching down on me...
I love you dad and always will....
but losing you is a great big deal....
the suffering has ended and you've gone home....
to sit with our Father on his throne....

Arizona Sunset

After we read this Shaelee broke down crying and said she loved and missed you so bad..I wrapped my arms around your baby girl because I know the pain ever so much...

I also want to say that Raquel Monday is one of the best friends in the world....She speaks to me and helps me through like so many others but we have a connection and we all know what that is...sunsets and sunrises...

So Tommy just wanted to say that we love you miss you just the same...No matter of time, no matter of space...our love will remain just the same...

Our Family 

We miss and love you dearly.

Linda, Shae, & Erik

October 17, 2011

Today is another day without you...I miss your smile, your laughter, I just miss you....I started writing your book about our life together....It is a way to honor you...You were and still are the best husband and father....

There are times that I just do not know if I can carry on  but then just as I am thinking that you come to my side and make me realize I have to for the kids.....

My precious Tommy

 There have been people that I have never met that are trying to comfort me....I know its you sending them my way.....I wish things were different....I wish you were here....Sometimes I do not know what to do and I don't have you to run to...

I know you do not want me to cry....well I just have a void in my heart that will remain...I know you understand but I also know and hear you saying, "Stop crying, it is okay. I love you and I am here always."

Our Family

You are the life within me.....I just have to learn to handle that you are not here in physical form....It will take me some time but it will come.
The kids are doing okay I guess, they miss you terribly and they love you more than anything

Our life

Thank you for being the husband and father you were and will continue to be....

We love you forever Tommy

Your wife and kids,
Linda, Shaelee, & Erik

October 16, 2011

Another day with out you breaks my heart....I know you understand because if it was turned around you would feel the same.....We are soul mates so only we know how painful it is.......

Our love 

I took the kids to Apache Jii yesterday but we did not stay long...after all you were suppose to be with us this year...You could not wait to go but here are some photos of the event.......

Apache Jii: Hoop Dancer

We want you to know that we love you and miss you dearly.....Time can never change our feelings....People say it will get easier...I do not understand those words because the pain I have in my heart will never cease.....I guess babes they just do not understand the love we share...You always said that there are few people in this world who love the way we do.....

Erik and Shaelee:  Apache Jii 2011

I spoke with my publisher and my Christmas short story, "Journey to Christmas Creek" will be published in your honor....Also I spoke with my publisher to find out if she would publish a book about our lives from the precious moment we met up until your tragic passing....Of course, she told me yes.....so babes I am writing a book on our love in honor of you....

Just know we love you and miss you dearly...always....

Here is your wedding band that I wear around my neck....It will always be treasured and stand for our love....  My wedding band remains on my finger where it will be until I see you again.....

Symbol of our love that stands forever

Your wife and kids,

Linda, Shae, & Erik

October 15, 2011

Tommy,

I want to write a letter to you today...I want to say all the things that I did not get to say...This is from me and the kids...We want you to know that we love you more than anything in the world...We did not get to say our last goodbyes to you before you went to be with the Creator....We want you to know that you were the best husband and father....You always spoke of how you were not afraid to die and that you believed and loved the Creator and I know you are with him...Know that we are sorry that we could not save you....If love could have saved you then you would be here with us today...because we love you more than anything...There are no words to explain how we feel other than...sorry, love, and helplessness....We know you do not want us to cry but we cannot help it....Please stay by our side.....

Now our hearts are empty, a void that cannot be replaced...We know that one day we will reunite but here on Earth it does not make it easier....So I guess we want to say...We love you...We miss you...Nothing can take your place...know you are with us in everything we do.....Nothing will ever change that...

We love you our dear sweet husband and father....

Tommy at Oak Flats

From me, I love you and I know you are with me....You were and are the best husband and I thank you for protecting me and watching over me...Help me through this....I know the Creator and you are carrying me...especially when I feel like I cannot go on....

Your wife forever

From your daughter, Shaelee....Dad I miss you and love you more than anything...I know you are with me...I feel you with everything I do......You are the best father a girl could have...Thank you for being there for me always no matter what...

Shaelee 

From your son, Erik...Dad I miss you too and love you....I miss your guidance but I will never forget what you taught me....I will look after mom and sister so do not worry....You are the best father in the world....

Erik

So, in closing Tommy just know how much we love you and that your absence will remain because there is nothing that can replace you...We love you always.....

Hawks soaring: Your favorite bird of prey

Your wife and kids,
Linda, Shaelee, & Erik

October 14, 2011

Well Tommy another day without your presence...It does not get easier and it never will....Time only makes me miss you more....I remember the day we spoke about our future....our plans to build a house.....now all I know is that I am lost....There are family members who say horrible things to me but I keep strong all because of you...
You were and still are my rock....

Rocks at Fort Bowie

I want to thank you for your love....for all the moments we spent together....I just want you to know that I love you with each passing day and that will never change...I sat alone and cry for you....Just know my love for you will never stop.....

You were the best husband and father in the world...You showed guidance to your kids and where always there for them....We speak your day everyday.....We talked about the funny things you would say.....

You are my soul mate and the love I feel will remain...Not time or anything can change that....I will try and be strong for you but know there are times that I feel I cannot go on and then something that I know is from you happens to remind me that I am not alone...that you are here..

Yesterday morning I was crying and shaking...felt like I could not go on but then I was mad because I miss you so but then I was trying to get my wallet in my purse and there was a little note, about the size of a nickel, from you that just was lying there in my purse...It was from you and it stated..."I Love You".....I realized you were here and that you were trying to tell me that it was okay..that you were okay...just waiting in a breathtaking place until I come...

The little note reminded me of all the times you would slip notes to me stating how much you loved me...That was our special thing that we shared.....I will never forget and I will hold on to the "little notes" forever

Shaelee & Erik

Love you with all my heart....Your kids love you with all their heart....

Forever,

Your loving wife and kids,

Flowers for you Tommy 

Linda, Shaelee, & Erik